Stimming

If you’ve ever caught yourself tapping your pen during a meeting, bouncing your leg while thinking, or humming the same tune over and over, you’ve been stimming. Stimming — short for self-stimulatory behaviour — is any repetitive movement, sound, or action that helps your nervous system feel balanced.

For neurodivergent people, especially those who are autistic, stimming often goes beyond casual fidgeting. It’s a vital tool for emotional regulation, sensory processing, and communication.

What stimming looks like

Stimming comes in countless forms, and everyone’s stims are unique to them:

Movement stims:

• Hand flapping or finger flicking
• Rocking, swaying, or pacing
• Spinning objects or spinning yourself
• Leg bouncing or toe tapping
• Jumping or repetitive movements

Sound stims:

• Humming, singing, or making vocal sounds
• Repeating words or phrases (echolalia)
• Clicking tongue or making mouth sounds
• Listening to the same song on repeat

Touch stims:

• Fidgeting with textures, fabrics, or objects
• Hair twirling or beard stroking
• Rubbing or scratching skin
• Playing with fidget toys or stress balls

Visual stims:

• Staring at lights, patterns, or moving objects
• Hand movements in peripheral vision
• Arranging objects in specific patterns

Why stimming matters

Stimming isn’t random behaviour — it serves important functions:

Emotional regulation: When you’re overwhelmed, excited, anxious, or happy, stimming can help your nervous system process those feelings. It’s like having an internal reset button.

Sensory management: If your environment is too much or too little stimulation, stimming can help balance things out. It might calm you down when overstimulated or provide needed input when understimulated.

Focus and concentration: Many people find they think better or pay attention more easily when they’re stimming. It’s not a distraction — it’s a tool that helps their brain work optimally.

Communication and expression: Sometimes stimming is how someone expresses joy, frustration, or other emotions when words aren’t enough or available.

Self-soothing and comfort: Familiar stims can provide comfort during stressful or uncertain times, like a portable piece of home.

Stimming across the neurodivergent community

While most associated with autism, stimming is common across neurodivergent experiences:

• People with ADHD often stim to maintain focus or manage energy
• Those with anxiety might stim to self-soothe
• People with sensory processing differences use stims to regulate input
• Many neurodivergent people develop stims as coping strategies

When society gets it wrong

Unfortunately, stimming is often misunderstood. You might have been told to “stop fidgeting,” “sit still,” or “pay attention” when your stims were actually helping you do exactly that.

Some harmful myths about stimming:

• “It’s just attention-seeking behaviour” (It’s actually self-regulation)
• “It’s disruptive and needs to be stopped” (Usually it’s helping, not hindering)
• “People should learn to control themselves” (Suppressing stims often makes things worse)

Supporting stimming in yourself and others

Good stim support looks like:

• Recognizing that stimming serves important purposes
• Providing stim-friendly environments when possible
• Offering alternatives if current stims aren’t working in a specific situation
• Never punishing or shaming someone for stimming
• Understanding that stopping someone from stimming can cause distress

The only time stimming might need guidance is if it’s causing physical harm or significant distress. Even then, the goal should be finding alternative stims, not eliminating stimming altogether.

Your stims are valid

Your stimming — whether it’s barely noticeable or highly visible — is a natural part of how your nervous system regulates itself. You don’t need to justify it, hide it, or apologize for it.

If stimming helps you feel centred, focused, or regulated, then it’s doing exactly what it’s supposed to do. In a world that often demands conformity, stimming can be a way to honor your authentic self and meet your genuine needs.